Interview – Michael Lopez

Hi Michael. Welcome to Female Fractionals. I'm so happy to have you here today.

Michael: Hi Amanda. Thanks for having me. And it's great to be with you in this new world that we're both in.

Amanda: Thank you. I'm super excited for our conversation. You have so many exciting things happening. Where I would love to start with you, because I find your background so fascinating, is to have you talk a little bit about your background, your career, and what brought you to where you are today.

Michael: Yeah. Thank you. I'm happy to tell the story and just say it's an honor to be on a podcast hosted by you and for women. I always say this — I was raised by strong women, married to one, and have worked with many amazing women. So thank you for giving me the chance to be on here. It really is a special thing.

You know, my background, I guess, has really happened in phases. We all start with a plan in life, and then life happens, and we discover things about ourselves that we maybe learned and didn't, or didn't know.

I started my career in government. I spent five years in the intelligence community. I have a bachelor's in political science. I kind of grew up and always wanted to be a spy. I thought that would be really cool. I was not a spy, just for the record, but I did work in that world. And I'll tell you that many of the amazing things I've learned as a leader, as a teammate, about organizations, really started in working with the military. I was on the military intelligence side — amazing leaders, generals, people that reached the highest levels of their organization, and yet have to work across a hundred-thousand-person team in some ways. Just a lot of wisdom that started there.

I played college football, so I come from this world of really strong teams and leaders and learning how to be a good follower — which is the first step in learning how to be a good leader.

I was in the government space in the late '90s. It was not the best time for the HR experience in the government world. I ran into this consulting company called Booz Allen Hamilton. Great organization, and I'll say that really started my journey of understanding what strong culture can do for a company. I think they were — and are — still really good at it.

We did all the project work. We sold some things, we bought some things, we created some new best practices. Then they said, "You could go into general management." And I was like, that sounds like the worst idea I could ever imagine. I don't want to go do that. I'm not the person who's going to go get an extra 1% margin out of a business — it's just not what I enjoy.

I had some colleagues that went to Ernst & Young, and I followed them there. I think that’s when I started my journey into where I am now — in the space of organizational change and transformation.

About a year and a half ago, I decided it was time to start my own thing. I’ve always tried to create change inside of big companies — asking, “Why are we doing it this way? Why can’t we do something different?” Breaking down barriers, established systems, and processes. Really being that sort of irritating little kid who never stops asking why.

But I realized that in order to build the thing I wanted to build, I had to do it in a way that was really authentic to me and my style and background. And so here I am. It's been a great almost two years in this new journey.

Amanda: I think that's a really great segue into your book, which I think so many of our audience can relate to. So much of the fractional or entrepreneurial world in general is about change — whether it's the change you're talking about in terms of making a change into a new career, or it's the change we experience every day. Whether it's code-switching to having to run an actual business yourself, and do all the things that you don't experience when that is taken care of for you — when you have the security and the safety of big business.

Could you provide an intro to your book, Change Six: Science-Backed Strategies to Transform Your Brain, Body, and Behavior, and talk about why you decided to focus on that and what is resonating with people?

Michael: Yeah. A couple of years ago, I really started doing a lot more on LinkedIn and posting content to start a different conversation. Having come from the world of organizational change management, I’ll say that I think that industry — that discipline — is in need of its own transformation.

Look, it's full of people doing good work, hard work, well-intentioned work. They care about culture, people, teams. But I was always struggling with the idea that we have this recipe of change management standards and frameworks, and yet 70% of all transformations fail. I couldn’t figure out: why are we doing the same things?

I've been both the deliverer and the recipient of those services. With my background in athletics, military, and everything else, I was like — we know so much about the body and how to adapt. Yet we show up to work and pretend those systems don’t apply. We send someone to a 30-minute training and pretend they’re different.

So I started posting on LinkedIn. It was really a mission to start a different conversation. There were times in my career I felt we were being disingenuous — sometimes outright dishonest — saying, “This is easy.” It’s not. They’re all hard, because they involve people.

That journey led to me building a framework, refining my point of view. I learned a lot just by posting and engaging. When I started my company, I planned to write the book right away. Some folks advised me to wait — get some revenue first. But I realized my differentiation as an entrepreneur is about my point of view. So writing the book was a necessity.

The book explores what happens in our brains and bodies when we try to change. It goes deep into systems we can leverage to help us change. I started writing it for organizations, but realized a third of the way through that I needed to step back and talk about individuals. It’s a toolkit for people to start their own change journey.

Amanda: Congratulations. I know firsthand — having helped multiple people publish books — how much of a labor of love it is. So, congratulations.

In thinking about who's listening to this podcast, I think the fractional movement is well underway, but there are also many people who are on the cusp of making — or thinking about — that leap. It’s a huge change, and a huge source of stress.

Could you offer some guidance to those people, from a scientific perspective? One of the things I love most about the book is that it’s grounded in science. Could you share a framework or perspective that could make taking that leap feel a little less stressful?

Michael: Well, I don’t know that we can actually make it less stressful — but we can change our relationship with stress. That’s one of the big principles and strategies in the book. One thing that holds us back is our relationship with discomfort. We often misunderstand what the stress response is meant to do.

Stress is designed to get you to move. That’s its physiological, evolutionary purpose. It doesn’t know why you’re nervous — it just knows to trigger a cascade of systems to make you act.

So, lean into that experience. Understand the difference between acute stress — the short-term kind that motivates us — and chronic or traumatic stress, which is harmful and requires care.

The book teaches that when you're stressed, it’s a signal. Go towards it. The only way out is through. I say to clients all the time: “The growth is in the struggle.” You will not make this transition successfully unless you first rebuild your relationship with stress.

The second thing is — don’t listen to your brain. I’ll use my own story. I come from humble beginnings. So, having a W2 job at a big consulting firm felt like I had made it. I was good — until I wasn’t.

Our brains are prediction machines. They're constantly guessing what’s going to happen next. But they can only guess based on our own past experiences. So when someone says, “That’s not possible,” maybe it’s not — for them. But that doesn’t mean it’s not possible for you.

So when your brain says, “You can’t do this,” don’t listen. You’re wrong by definition — you don’t know all the possible outcomes.

The third thing: most people set a goal and work backward from it, creating steps and KPIs to track progress. But here's the thing — when we focus only on the outcome, we lose motivation. The best advice I got from my coach was: “You have a job, it’s just different.”

Fall in love with the process of building something new. That’s where motivation comes from. Science shows we’re more motivated when we’re striving, rather than when we’re avoiding something or standing still.

So instead of asking, “What did I accomplish today?” ask, “Did I take steps toward my goal?” Even if it’s just one step. That mindset shift makes all the difference.

Amanda: I really love that. I framed the question for people thinking about taking the leap, but that answer is just as relevant for those already in it — like me. There’s so much code-switching. It’s a completely different way of operating from what I was doing a year ago.

Those tips really resonate:

• Lean into stress.
  

• Don’t listen to your brain.
  

• You have a job; it’s just different.
  

• Fall in love with building.

Changing your perspective when doing a variation on a theme of a job is so important.

Michael: And those things apply to life in general. Whether it’s making more money, building a better relationship, or losing weight — we set huge goals that feel so overwhelming they actually demotivate us.

One spoiler from the book: if you’ve ever made a vision board — they’re actually counterproductive. Vision boards can demotivate you.

Here’s why: when we focus on a future self, we get a little dopamine or serotonin hit. “Wow, I’m going to be so happy when I’m XYZ.” But if you flip that — if you’re happy when you’re delivering XYZ effort — you’re working in a way that reinforces real change.

I’m happy when I’m running. When I’m studying. When I’m writing. It’s the act of doing — not the outcome — where real motivation happens. That’s what we get wrong about goals.

Amanda: I love that for so many reasons. I love the focus on action vs. outcome. And also, it makes me feel better because I’ve never done a vision board! I’ve gotten flack for it over the years, but I’ve never had the “screensaver vision board” come January.

Michael: I was once at a conference talking about this, and they teased me for “ruining” vision boards for everyone. I said, “Hey, I didn’t do the study — I’m just quoting the research.”

Amanda: You’re just spreading the word. It’s OK!

So, given that you’ve literally written the book on change — when you’re having a hard moment, how do you push through?

Michael: I really do live by these principles. Someone told me once, “The way we do some things is the way we do everything.”

First, I try to self-induce as much stress as possible — positive stress. I’m not trying to create chaos, but when I choose the source of the stress, it actually builds my brain.

There’s a region called the anterior mid-cingulate cortex — the AMCC. It’s part of your frontal lobe. When you do hard things, or things you don’t want to do, this region increases in density. Athletes have the largest AMCCs. People who live long lives have large AMCCs.

So I look for small hard things I can do: dishes, mowing the lawn, cold showers. Cold showers are miserable, but I do it every day because I know I’ll feel better afterward.

Second, I don’t listen to my brain — especially when I’m anxious. In this world, you don’t get paid every two weeks. Revenue comes in big chunks. So when I feel uncertain, I remind myself that the next opportunity is around the corner.

Third, I move. When I’m anxious, I act. What can I work on right now that will move me forward? Social media, client follow-up, content, outreach, solutions — whatever it is. The Navy SEALs say, “When you're lost, the worst thing you can do is stay put.” You get no new information that way. You have to move.

And finally, I lean on my environment. I have amazing people around me, and I ask for help. This can be a lonely world if you’re just beating the bushes by yourself. Social interaction is one of the most biologically rewarding things we can do. So I reach out, and I build my ecosystem.

Amanda: Those are really great pieces of guidance — especially for new entrepreneurs, but honestly, for year one through year five.

Michael: You know what I should add? You’re going to make mistakes — whatever you define as a mistake. From a neuroplasticity perspective, mistakes are the most powerful way we learn.

If you’re worried about being perfect, this is going to be really hard. No one is thinking about you as much as you are. What feels like the end of the world to you is just an opportunity to get better.

That’s part of having a growth mindset — or what’s called a “stress-is-enhancing” mindset. One study I reference in the book shows that when we change our thinking to “this may not feel good, but it’s good for me,” it triggers new ways of learning and acting. That’s how we grow.

Amanda: That’s great.

You’ve been serving clients for a long time. Now that you’re out on your own, two years later, is there anything you think, “Wow, I nailed that,” or, “I wish I had done that differently”?

Michael: I think with every engagement, you reflect on what could’ve gone better. I’ve been fortunate. I’ve partnered with a few other independent consultants in a kind of collective. That’s made a big difference — I’m not doing this alone.

As for what I’d do differently — pricing. Especially in your first or second project, pricing can be tough. Maybe you’re competing with someone, or even just competing with your own fear.

One great piece of advice I got: “You’re less expensive than the big firms because you don’t have the overhead — but that doesn’t mean you undervalue yourself.”

You’re part of a fractional community. Don’t devalue your work just because you’re solo. Pricing isn’t just time-per-hour — it’s time plus value. That value includes your expertise and experience.

I’ve learned to communicate that — especially for things like workshops. I’ll tell a client, “It cost me X hours of time — you’re not just paying for that, you’re paying for what I bring to the table.”

I’ve also experimented with business development and outreach. LinkedIn is a great place for that, though it’s a noisy place. One piece of advice I loved: “Most people on LinkedIn are trying to tell you something so they can sell you something.” That stuck with me.

Now, I focus less on landing the sale and more on building relationships. Referrals are powerful. And I think finding a BD strategy that feels authentic to you is key.

Amanda: That’s great — and you are a LinkedIn Top Voice, which is amazing. It’s clearly working for you. Your voice is authentic and very “you,” and you’re speaking about important topics in a very Michael way. I appreciate that.

Before we go into rapid fire — how can everyone get a copy of the book?

Michael: It’s available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Ingram — all the major platforms. You can also go to my website: michaeljlopez.coach. There’s a link right on the homepage.

From there, you can also follow or connect with me on LinkedIn — I prefer connections over followers. I’m active on Instagram, and I just started a YouTube channel where I host my weekly LinkedIn Live series with other Top Voices. All those episodes live there.

The way I like to wrap every conversation is with some rapid fire questions.

Michael: Let’s do it. You have free reign — ask me anything.

Amanda: These are meant to be answered in one word or one sentence or less.

Michael: I’ll do my best.

Amanda: Most unusual place you’ve taken a client call?

Michael: I’ve taken client calls from other client locations, which is kind of weird. So it feels a little bit like cheating in some ways. But yeah, that’s probably the most unusual.

Amanda: Best investment you’ve made in yourself?

Michael: Health, fitness, exercise. Yeah, it all starts with that.

Amanda: Fun fact about you that’s not on your LinkedIn profile?

Michael: I’m partially colorblind. What that means is I can’t see very light colors — they just look white. Very dark colors just look black. So, fun fact: I can’t see rainbows.

Amanda: Three apps you can’t live without?

Michael: My Peloton app is a big one. I mean, it sounds sad to say my social media apps, but I use them so much for work… so I’ll say that. My Podcasts app — I love podcasts. And I’m a big Blinkist fan. I love quick summaries of books, particularly for work. So I’d say: Apple Podcasts, Blinkist, and Peloton.

Amanda: Favorite way to celebrate a win?

Michael: Dinner with my wife.

Amanda: Most used emoji in professional texts?

Michael: Probably the thumbs up 👍.

Amanda: I was wondering if you were an emoji guy.

Michael: I have this weird feeling that men over 40 shouldn’t use too many emojis. I don’t know — just a theory. Maybe not a habit, but yeah.

Amanda: What’s your go-to comfort food?

Michael: Oh, comfort food... I really like dark chocolate.

Amanda: And finally, favorite business book that you’ve read recently?

Michael: How Emotions Are Made by Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett. It’s not technically a business book, but sort of is. I reference it in my book. It was a transformative understanding of how our brains actually work. It’s really incredible.

Amanda: Your rapid-fire session is over! Thank you for giving me free reign.

Michael: Thank you!

Amanda: Thank you so much for coming on the podcast. This was an amazing discussion. I think our listeners are going to take away so many things. I wrote notes down — and I’ve already had multiple discussions with you about your book — so hopefully our listeners had a pen and paper out.

Thank you so much, Michael. It was great to see you.

Michael: Thank you — and congrats to you on this endeavor and all the good stuff you’re doing. It’s been fun to be on this journey a little bit together with you. I’m really excited for you. Thanks for having me.

Amanda: As always, please remember to follow, like, comment, and share. And don’t forget to head over to femalefractionals.com for a full transcript of the show and links to everything we talked about during our conversation. Thanks for listening!

Resources, Offers & Links:

• Grab Michael’s Book: Change Six: Science-Backed Strategies to Transform Your Brain, Body, and Behavior on Amazon and other major platforms. You can also find it on his website: michaeljlopez.coach

Love the show? Don’t forget to like, follow, rate, and share to help us grow the Female Fractionals community.

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